All You Have At The End
by Tragic Ophelia
Summary: All you have at the end of your life are memories... Good and bad. So Abbie makes the most of her life.


Author: Ally

E-mail: Insanechica14@aol.com

Notes: I've had the idea for this for a looooooong time. And here it is! Anyway, it's unique... But good unique! Feedback please.

It always rains or snows today. Usually rain, but up here, you can get snow in October. Back in Texas, snow wasn't common. Ice? Sure. The roads would be hell, and it was normal. Just another day trying to get through Dallas traffic. Snow was more or less unseen. Back to today... Right.

Today, about ten years ago, I was raped. And it wasn't easy. For years, I thought it was my fault. And that's what drove me to where I am. Part of the New York state legal system. To make a difference in people's lives. Yeah, a big help to other people.

And now I'm leaving. Leaving this whole damn city. I left not long after the incident. But now I need to go home. I need to face my fears, face my past. Exorcise my demons, whatever you want to call it. But whatever it was... I needed to do it. "You can't live in the past, Abbie..." Those words always rang through my ears. 

I'd said goodbye to everyone. Earlier in the day, I'd stopped by the 27th precinct, and talked with Anita and Lennie. Ed had left a while ago, and Rey... Rey was in Chicago, with Deborah and the kids, since her parents lived there. After that, it was over to Jack's office. Adam and Nora were gone, and I didn't know Serena. 

So this was it. One last meeting, and I could leave New York without a thought about it. As I entered the bar, no one seemed to really jump out at me. I looked around, and finally spotted who I was meeting.

"Carmichael."

"Logan."

"Didn't think you'd show," Mike said, drinking a beer.

"What, and miss the intelligent conversation? Wouldn't dream of not showing," I said, sliding into the seat across from him.

"And I was about to go see if I could get a date with that blonde."

"In your dreams."

"Yep." Mike picked up something next to him, and set it on the table, sliding it across to me. "Open it, Abbie."

"Patience is a virtue, Mike. Maybe you should learn that," I teased. Picking up the box, I gave it a small shake. 

"Yeah, maybe, but then I'd probably be out of a job," he said. 

"You punch another councilman, and you will be out of a job... Or argue with the lieutenant..."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence. You gonna open that or what?"

"In a second." I stared at the silver box. What the hell would be in there? Shrugging, I picked it up and tore off the wrapping. Inside was a silver necklace with a pendant. "Oh, god, it's beautiful."

"It's an Irish symbol... Friendship, I think," he said.

"Thanks, for everything."

"It's no problem, Abbie. That's what friends are for, right? Whatever you need, etcetera," Mike said, ordering a club soda. I looked at him incredulously. "What? I still need to do some work on a case."

"You get back to Manhattan, and you work all the time... What kind of friend are you? You take off, have a drink with me... And go back to work! Logan, I'm shocked," I said, laughing slightly.

"Doesn't suit you much. When's your flight?"

"Tomorrow at noon. I'll stop by in the morning before heading to JFK." 

"Got it. I better get back to the house. Ready to go?" Mike asked, standing up.

"Yeah, I'm ready," I said, placing the box with the necklace in my purse. He threw a few bills on the table, and we walked out into the rain. "So this is it."

"You know that no matter what, you can call me. Anytime, day or night."

"I know. Same goes to you, of course."

"Yeah. Call me when you get to Dallas. I'll see you, Carmichael."

"Wouldn't doubt it, Logan," I said, kissing him on the cheek. As I walked down the street, I realized that after I had cleared my past in Dallas, I'd have to come back here. Always something tying me back home. Here, it was my closest friend. Back there, it was the most traumatic event of my life. 

As I walked through the city I had come to call home, realization dawned on me. I had a choice about my life. You can change your destiny, believe it or not. And I had just changed mine. Quitting my job, leaving my home, my friends... Just to change my future. 

As I walked through downtown, I took in the skyline. Things had changed since I had left Dallas, since I had left the DA's office... And things would change after I left here. It was nice to know that the cycle never stopped. People lived their lives through traumatic events. And I was going to do that. I was going to live again.

The next morning, as I sat in my seat, I looked out the window once more. This city, the next city... Everything was just going to be a memory soon. And I was going to make those memories count. Make them last. After all, that's all life was. A string of memories that made you a survivor, whatever. All you had at the end of your life were memories. 

The material things don't matter, and the money will be gone eventually. Doing something worth writing about, or writing something worth reading, whatever... As I stepped off the plane in Dallas, the sun shined down on me, and I smiled. I was going to make a great string of memories.

As I called Mike, I realized that I needed to make a decision. Regarding something he had asked a long time ago. To make my dreams come true.

"Logan."

"Hey. It's me, and I'm here safely."

"Good."

"And remember what you asked a few weeks ago?"

"Yeah..."

"Yes. I'll marry you."


End file.
